@#$% you sugar companies

Good morning readers!

It is a fine day today, and an important day in history. On this day in 1759 the French and Indian War ended, in 1850 the Fugitive Slave law was passed, in 1851 the first edition of the New York Times was published, in 1970 Jimi Hendrix passed away, and in 1999 Sammy Sosa became the first baseball player to hit 60 home runs in two seasons.

That’s peachy, but I wanna make this day something more. In my dreams this day, September 18, 2008, is the day the Corn Refiners Association is put behind bars. Now that would be monumental.

Think about it. No more ridiculous ads for fructose syrup saying it’s NOT bad for you. The ads literally push the message, “It’s not bad for

you,” of course, it’s not good for you, so they just say, “it’s not that bad.”

Somebody slap her

Never in my life did I think Americans would reach a point where we were the fattest, dumbest nation, but we embraced the idea with open arms through our ad sense.

When are people going to get it. SUGAR IS BAD FOR YOU!

“Yes, but blah blah fructose isn’t worse than sugar…and everything is fine in moderation blah blah,” says the Corn Refiners Association President Audrae Erickson.

Fuck you Audrae. You and your ads which will kill more people. God I hope they Joan of Arc you before it’s too late.

Please do not believe the message of the following ads. (Remember: it’s good to be a skeptic!)

I know, I know, you can have the landlord come and fix that hole you just smashed in the wall. He’ll understand just show him the ads.

Before I get into this I must present the article from NYTimes that does state a scientific study shows High Fructose Corn Syrup is not directly related to obesity or diabetes.

And before I start bashing I would like to announce I am proud to be HFCS free and sugar free. None of it is good for you. NONE.

Rundown:

a) Sugar is bad for you. i can’t make that clear enough. there have been studies that tried to claim sugar is a drug. They were not proven, but it has been proven that sugar IS an addictive chemical (what’s the difference between a drug and an addictive chemical? Drugs are natural. Weed>sugar)

b) High Fructose Corn Syrup, though proven to be the same as sugar (notice sugar statement just mentioned), is also BAD for you. End of story. Fructose enters the system and turns into fat over time, but the immediate effect of fructose in the body is that it STORES double the fat of your next meal, disabling you from burning off that lunch from a short walk. It literally holds on to it, so even exercise cannot help you.

c) have you seen people? I know i’ve looked in the mirror and nearly thrown up from the excessive fat around the pectorals, obliques, and stomach. It’s out of control. The cause—>you guessed it. Every soda drank holds on to the fat of the next meal while also turning into fat itself.

d) In order to burn off the amount of calories from a can of soda and the fat from the next meal which it stores, one would have to run roughly a mile and a half to burn off the initial calories, then an additional mile for each 4g of sugar consumed (roughly another 9 miles), and then an additional mile per 100 calories of your next meal. If you drink a can of soda and on’t want any negative effects on your body, you would have to run roughly 15 miles.

If you are confused allow me to clarify why. Sugar enters the body and metabolizes at an extremely high rate. It is hypo-glycemic and enters the bloodstream immediately giving energy that is supposed to be burned. If everyone on earth walked at an average speed of 20 mph and walked all day, soda would be a NECESSITY. Wake up call: we don’t. Most of us sit around and play Bioshock. Sugar and HFCS are highly concentrated and overused.

e) In moderation? Did you notice that little bit in the ads? Makes me laugh. So by “in moderation,” they of course didn’t realize there are 36 grams of sugar in products like Vitamin Water, Coke, and Snapple?

4 grams= 1 teaspoon

36 grams = 9 teaspoons

That’s real moderate.

f) Our bodies don’t need sugar. If someone told you that, it is a lie. Our body CAN TOLERATE one or two pieces of fruit per day… and that’s natural sugar. that’s about it. Fruit also has high fiber and vitamins. What does soda have? Nothing.

Our bodies NEED water. SO FUCKING BAD. WATER WATER WATER WATER, it’s all our bodies want. That’s all we should give it.

I’m bashing splenda, I’m bashing sweet & low, I’m bashing equal, I’m bashing hfcs, and I’m bashing sugar.

Most importantly the shitface of the day goes to Audrae Erickson for leading her company, the Corn Refiners Association, to deceive Americans. You bitch.

Pancaking the president

Wow that’s a really homosexual post title. Anyway, today’s breakfast conversation will be, unfortunately, about politics.

tweedle dee and tweedle dum getting pancaked

Since this blog is new and I am making my presence on the internet known slowly and subtly, I might as well do it right.

I am neither a fan of McCain or Obama. they both fail to “change” this nation and “fight for freedom.” So neither is better than the other. Don’t leave any comments saying, “but Obama is the lesser of two evils, so choose the lesser of the two evils” because in the words of the wise, intelligent Ron Paul, “I don’t do that, evil is evil.”

This election seems more intense than any other in recent history.* What a great first Presidential election for my peers and I.

However, that’s peachy, but this two party system which has overrun the country, overrun the media and left many Americans seriously uninformed. I don’t know who is more responsible for the collapse of American Democracy, the main stream media or the two party system, but since Obama and McCain are getting the pancakes today let’s just bash them.

I must admit I was once part of the Obamania. I couldn’t wait for a black President. In fact, if you asked me a few years ago, “hey Tom… if four years from now a black presidnet was running…would you vote for him?” I would immediately respond with yes. Yeah, I was a rebel.

But in this Obamania, I started to see flaws, flaws that fellow Obama fans didn’t see. I couldn’t figure out why I began to see them until I heard Ron Paul speak. Ron Paul reminded me that I am a Republican.** But that was certainly not a legitamte reason not to vote for my dream candidate, who wanted change and was black…

So the Obamania continued. Then, Obama voted for FISA. Oh. Okay.

Mmhmm.

That’s cool right?

No. Oh wait…let me look it up, maybe George Bush’s (and all the other quasi republicans) anti terror anti privacy unconstitutional government power is actually a good thing.

It’s not. End of story. I like my rights and I like SMALL GOVERNMENT like a REAL REPUBLICAN should. I forgot that Obama was a democrat because of his perfect rhetoric.***

So Obama lost my vote that day. Not immediately though, I am not ignorant. I spent the next four hours researching why he voted for it. Turns out middle america red-state republicans/undecided voters thought Obama had a weak anti-terror policy.

So Obama, for calling for change when you are becoming a normal, moderate, presidential candidate who will do what ever it takes to win, you are a pancake.

McCain…I don’t even want to get started on why you are lacking, because you are lacking in so many ways.

McCain is not a republican, he is barely conservative. He is a post-Reagan quasi Republican who contradicts the four main ideas a conservative republican wants.

4 issues:

Federal Power

Conservative’s would want small government. He wants anti terror anti privacy laws and wants to further diminish the constitution.

Federal Reserve/Gold Standard

Conservative’s would want it back. I want my dollar to be worth $1. I don’t like it when Bush calls up the Federal Reserve and asks for 3 trillion dollars for war, diminishing my dollar. McCain wants to keep it for stronger military presence in the world.

War

A real republican would not want unnecessary wars.**** McCain is pro war. (A real American would never want a pre-emptive war)

Pork barrel spending

And this little piggy went to the market...to spend 3 trillion dollars recruiting soldiers through the no child left behind act

Conservative’s would want none of it. NONE. it’s a democrat thing. Reagan and Bush started it, and McCain wants to continue it. I don’t understand why.

Americans used to have a choice with some of these issues, opposition for these four issues*****, but today, Obama and McCain agree on ALL FOUR of these issues. What kind of choice is that?

McCain, you are a big floppy pancake. BAM. Right in the shnoz.

If you haven’t already figured out I’m a Constitutional Conservative Republican. And I am voting for Ron Paul.

Notes:

*Though the candidates are basically the same, the main stream media has failed the country, and Americans are more uninformed than ever. On a social level it IS more intense than ever however.

** I was born and raised in Totowa, New Jersey. It is the only conservative town in the county of Passaic and the Republican percentage is 75%.

*** Obama’s rhetoric is interesting to watch but I find that many people do not support him because of his actually policies. I thought he was the best candidate because of his voice, but when I see his tax policy I wonder if anyone knows how different it is than the current.

**** Before operation Iraqi freedom Republicans were elected to brign troops home.

Ronaldinhio the narcissistic douche

Known as one of the greatest footballers in history and arguably the best player in the world right now, is a pancake.

Congradulations Dinho, you’ve managed to piss me off to the point of no return. There are two reasons why you suck.

Number 1: you made everyone in Milan really really happy, for a few days, and now they are going to hate you, because you suck.

This summer the talk of the transfer world was Dinho leaving Barcelona for AC Milan, the most trophied team in history. The AC Milan Dinho combination was intended to do wonders for the club, he was supposed to add to the chemistry of the brazilian talent of the team already established by Kaka and Alexandre Pato. He was supposed to bring Milan back up to the top of Serie A, win the Scudetto, and next year, qualify and win the UEFA Champions League.

Milan have played two games this year, they lost both of them. Miserably. Way to go Beaverman. You suck.

Dinho is old and just plays with the ball rather than actually scoring. Thos etactics worked in the 90’s earl millenium, but eventually players in la Liga caught on, and when Frank Rijkaard, formerly coach of Barcelona, realized that Dinho was good for nothing he gave Dinho shit, and Dinho bitched out and faked an injury all season.

The most idiotic part of this story is that when Dinho got to AC Milan he admitted to reporters that he had faked an injury because of the way he was treating by Rijkaard for not performing well. Now the cats out of the bag, so what will his excuse be when he cannot perform at AC Milan.

The Italians won’t stand for that shit. Especially Ancelloti, coach of Milan.

Brazil fans also seems to be fed up with the lack of performance.

Am I the only one who will go out on a limb and say it? It’s possible…to be bad…because you are not good anymore. It is possible. Get over it people.

Now let’s get to that second reason:

FIFA09.

The only way I can explain my hatred is by saying that one year ago I knew a few things:

a) Barcelona was the best team in the FIFA video game

b) the FIFA video game was paid for by someone, but I didn’t know who

c) my favorite team, Olympic Lyon, were not rated that well…but it was ok, becuase they weren’t the best team

This year I know a few new things

a) AC Milan is the best team in the game-even though they did not qualify for the most prestigious tournament in football last year

b) FIFA is paid for by Dinho

c) His face is all over the video game

Dinho, you have ruined my one and only all time favorite sports video game with your selfish ways. Stop putting pictures of yourself on the brick walls in the neighborhood next to the field!

Xang Xi is an ass

I wonder, on this Tuesday morning, at what point did the world decide to start waking up so early? Why does society no encourage sleeping in all the time? What society originally initiated that forcibly awaking it’s citizens would benefit people?

Now it has become common scientific knowledge that our bodies need a certain amount of sleep, 8 hours for the average adult, and it is also proven that waking up to a goddam alarm clock can decrease someone’s productivity enormously. So the question I ask is…why am I awake?

Simple really…because I have class at 10am. Emerson college has not yet changed it’s system to adapt to common scientific knowledge of the human body.

Although, it is probably my fault that I am awake because of my class at 10am, because I chose my schedule. What we don’t realize is that we believe that waking up early is “good for us,” it “gets us going,” and at the time I picked my schedule, since I was not tired, I felt that 10am class would be easily awoken to.

As well it should be, if you haven’t seen the 2008 sleep poll summary of results, the average workday wake time is 5:35 am, and non workday wake time is 7:12 am. What the fuck?!?!

Could this get any worse? Yes! 32% of Americans said they get good night’s sleep a few times a month or less!!! I don’t want to live in this world where sleep is low priority.

I know for a fact that when i wake up to an alarm very early, I get up and go shower, exercise, go to class and/or work, and when I get back from that or at any break I get I NAP. Waking up to an alarm drains your ability to be more productive than what is expected of you.

Have you ever woken up to the natural feeling of being ready to wake up? I have. On those days….I am a superhero.

I start those days whisking egg white omelettes with one hand and writing novellas with the other. Then I go everywhere and do everything, why? because I’m not tired. My body said…

WAKE UP DOUCHEBAG!!!!!! And I did.

Which brings me to today’s pancake:

Xang Xi, congratulations you are a greasy flat sponge who deserves to be eaten with disgust for inventing the first ever alarm clock.

Known as the “striking clock” in the 9th century, it awoke villagers to start the farming early.

I hate flapjacks

They suck.

What is a pancake? literally it’s a combination of eggs, oil, milk, and flour; which are fried on a griddle of lard and then topped with sugarsugarsugarsugarsugar. Theoretically it’s something that makes me feel like shit, and I hate them.

First off, they make the entire house smell like my Grandpa’s Lincoln Continental.

Secondly, after eating them I feel like a bird hocked up on rice.

So, since I like to complain and I’m kind of a douchebag, what better way to share my daily pancakes with you.

Every day check the blog for either a daily pancake…

or a daily waffle- something amazing